That they admonish the young women to love their husbands (Titus 2:4)
Loving A Husband Is A Process
Men and women are not from the same planet. A popular book suggests men are from Mars and women are from Venus describing the differences in their character, attitudes and views of life. When God formed man of the dust of the ground, He said it was not good for man to be alone creating the woman from a part of his body. The union of Adam and Eve was a perfect companionship of the eternal wisdom of God. Everything in the world is in a perfect order designed to magnify the glory of the Creator. The heavens, stars and everything on earth testify to the incredible power of God’s wisdom. This is evident in the formation of man and woman. Yet, in the marvelous design of the home, the man and woman are very different from one another. In the home, the perfection of the pattern the Lord is established.
Paul’s admonition to older women is rather astonishing. They need to teach young women how to love their husbands. It is assumed that because young people fall in love they have all the answers. Cultures have different rules of engagement. Some societies have arranged marriages and some allow marriages to come solely from the heart. The Lord is silent on the matter and either means of marriage are acceptable. Eastern cultures are more inclined towards marriages arranged by others in contrast to Western cultures that encourage marriage of the heart. Whatever the case, older women need to be teaching younger women to love their husbands.
Love is a splendid thing but it is also a learning process. Marriages often fail because the romantic love has waned and the couple is unprepared for the realities of life. One of the failures of the western culture of marriage does not understand that marriage cannot be based simply upon the flutter of the heart. This is a vital part of the union of man and woman but when the screen fades to black, life takes on another realization. The real problem with life is there is no background music. As a society, we try to live life like the one we see on television. Everything is romantic, beautiful and filled with music as the scene fades to black and our hearts are overwhelmed with passion. This is an important part of marriage but after the long walk on the beach with the sun setting softly behind the couple madly in love and music playing romantically – it is time to pack up the picnic basket and go home. Dishes must be washed, clothes put in the laundry and kids fed and put to bed. Women must learn to love their husbands because marriage is reality in a day-to-day form that is more than fading black and background music.
Learning to love the husband is an education of patience, understanding, sympathy, forgiveness, forbearance and acceptance that he will not always be wearing his shining armor. He may snore, slurp his soup and when he wakes up in the morning look like a train wreck. Newlyweds will be surprised to learn that disagreements will come and the husband may become angry. Puppy love will not fix that problem. If the husband spends money over the budget, forgets an anniversary or does not listen or remember what he is supposed to and somebody has to do the dishes; love becomes a learning process of showing the glory of God in the heart. Learning to love a husband is a lesson from the Lord that love is to grow. The incredible love that begins a marriage should not be the same in years to come. Like a seed planted in the ground, love must begin small and grows through nurturing, expanding, building up and establishing deep roots in the love of God so the love of the heart can blossom forth in the relationship of man and woman.
There will be storms that come in the home and the husband and wife must prepare themselves to love one another through these difficult times. This comes about by learned love. Older women are to teach younger women because they have learned the lessons of married life that endures. God hates divorce for many reasons but one reason is the husband and wife fail in making love endure. It requires learning how to love at all times. Love never fails – people do. Older women should be teaching younger women how to love their husbands. Younger godly women will find greater love in their marriage if they will listen to older godly women. God said so.