Training To Love


That they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children. (Titus 2:4)

Training To Love

The prevalent view of love is that it is an intense feeling that creates itself and sustains itself each day with a euphoric happiness of mystical proportions. In other words, love is always a strong feeling of attachment that will keep the relationship somewhere between heaven and earth every moment of every day for a lifetime. The evidence of this view of love comes from so many who decide when the charm fails, the romance ends and life begins to crowd in that divorce is necessary to rekindle the exhilarated moments of true love. Love and marriage is supposed to be an endless field of daffodils, sunshine and music but sometimes life becomes difficult and challenging and there is no music. The job becomes a hassle and the kids have the flu and money is hard to come by and the last thing you want is music; and love takes on a completely new perspective. Arguments arise because the romantic days of the honeymoon have faded into the reality of life. Differences in how to spend money, what decisions need to be made, and the crush of life take their toll. Age begins to change the marriage with physical changes. Pressures mount as couples struggle to keep their heads above water. Love takes on a persona that is unexpected.

Paul admonished Titus to teach sound doctrine. The context of this doctrine focuses on the relationship of the family as husbands and wives learn how to love one another. It is interesting the terminology the Holy Spirit uses when He exhorts older men and women to teach younger women how to love their husbands and children. God has instilled in man a deeply emotional power called love. In the Old Testament, Jacob saw Rachel and fell in love with her. The immense feelings of love for others is one of the greatest gifts man has been given. This kind of love creates relationships holding them in union for a lifetime. But there is another kind of love that is a learned love that is just as vital as the “puppy love” of first sight.

Older women are instructed to teach younger women to love their husbands. There will be times in a marriage when puppy love will not solve the problem. It should never be lost and should always be part of the foundation of the relationship. The challenge is that when life creeps in the marriage and things become difficult, it will take a deeper kind of love to carry through. Older women know the years of experience that love needs learning forgiveness, patience, understanding and the meaning of lasting love. Husbands and wives will face challenges. As sure as the devil is real, there will be marital problems. Learning how to deal with those problems takes a higher level of love. Younger women must learn how to find a different kind of love that will see them through the hard times. Younger men must learn how to be leaders in the home showing lasting love for their wives. This does not come naturally. A successful marriage is not a caught religion but a taught religion.

The Bible is the marriage guide on how to love one another. Everything a man and women need to learn about love is from the mind of God. Love is found in sacrifice, patience, kindness, forgiveness, and the hosts of things that define the child of God. Learning how to control the tongue is love. Having a longsuffering spirit, being kindly affectionate to one another, continuing steadfastly in prayer, being of the same mind, abhorring evil and clinging to goodness are all foundations of a lasting love. These must be learned from the word of God. Those who follow the will of God are those who know the greatest heights of love in a marriage. Love is a deeply emotional bond that brings two people together but the love found in God’s word is the unbreakable cement of a marriage that will never fail. Older men and women must teach the younger how to love their families. Younger men and women must listen to the voice of the older men and women who have founded their lives on the word of God.

There would be more marriages made in heaven if there were more young people who with the thought of their future children, were prayerfully willing to give God a voice in their final decision. (Leo Trese, Parent and Child, 1962)

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